Brene' Brown says "Ordinary courage is about putting our vulnerability on the line." I consider myself to be a private person, I am not one to tell people of my woes and worries or of being vulnerable. Therefore, I always appear to be strong. I have been called Polly Anna many times because I choose to look for a lesson in any given situation, which I believe is actually a good thing. The truth is I like Polly Anna!!!
I've been questioning myself...
IF I value the stories of lessons learned by others who have chosen to follow their creative spirits
IF I learned from the stories they told about the hurdles they overcame
IF I was there to celebrate their successes
IF I wanted this blog to be about my creative journey
Then I will become more vulnerable to share not only the highs but the lows, as well, of my creative journey.
Today in meditation (I follow Deepak Chopra and Oprah 21 day meditation) Deepak said "Not knowing what is the next thing that will bring you joy is called The Wisdom of Uncertainty. Be quiet and receptive inside, open your eyes, and the next thing you see may be a source of magnificent joy." When I heard those words tears started streaming down my face. It was those words I needed to hear.
What a relief it is, because of my Polly-Anna personality, to know that what I am feeling has a title The Wisdom of Uncertainty. Ever since I lost my job in February and decided I was going to follow my creative path full-time I've had this unspoken, underlying, uncertainty of fear. There I said it! I've never said those words out loud because I didn't want to jinx my belief that I am doing exactly what I am suppose to be doing. Now I have come to understand that keeping them to myself was detrimental to me and my creative journey. I will continue to show up everyday (in my studio), do the work (creating art), and let the Universe/God take care of the rest. The difference is that the silent fear no longer has power over me, I spoke it out loud, I called it out!
I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your continued support and encouragement.